I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
