I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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