yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
