I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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