She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
