OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
