Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Randomize
