oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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