Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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