why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
