There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
