in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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