am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I will be naked everywhere
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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