he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
