and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
