I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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