Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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