make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
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