Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
