that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
