can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
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