Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
