Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
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