dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
