There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
