Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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