I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
