Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
