Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
