I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize