Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Randomize
