I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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