i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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