operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
