just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i will never coherently bang her
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
