I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
