And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize