I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
