I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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