some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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