a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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