Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize