I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
