found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
