There was a lot of him and a little penis
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize