it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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