He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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