Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
