He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
