Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
it glows. i had to have it.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize