After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
